A blaze of light in every word...

My faith was strong, but I needed proof, 

and then I saw you bathing on the roof.

Your beauty in the moonlight overthrew me.

I tied you to a kitchen chair,

I broke your throne, I cut your hair,

and from your lips I drew an hallelujah.

The minor fall, the major lift...

I'm starting to think things don't actually happen for a reason. Maybe we're just grasping for ways to make sense of the chaos around us, and giving meaning to things, which don't have any meaning at all. Maybe we're clinging to hope and our dreams so hard that we forgot about reality. What if we're wrong, and nothing is meant to be? Maybe we're just lost souls endlessly wandering the plains, desperately seeking comfort that things will work out in the end no matter what. What if we tricked ourselves into believing our lives have some sort of purpose, just so we don't have to face the truth that they might not?

How do you end a viscous cycle? This continuum of selectiveness is about the cause and effect of medicating your medication. I run to substances that make it easier to move on, to mend a broken heart, to toast the glory days, yet I wonder if, when push comes to shove, I'm strong enough to survive on my own, without the vapours of potential addictions running through my veins. As tragic as it may seem, I think we all cling to certain things, certain people, anything really to make everyday seem like it's worth it. Then when moments come which take our breath away, which transform the very fabric of who we are, we have something familiar at our side, something that reminds us of home. It's been six months, and at long last, this boy is ready to march back from where he came from. Then I shall finally bare witness to how much I have changed, and how much I still need to.

I've heard there was a secret cord...

They never warn you about what happens when the sun sets in paradise. What kind of spectres and demons awake to haunt the fields, as you try to catch the last rays of hallelujah. I promised myself I wouldn't be too sad, and I'm not, there are just times when I think what would have been if we had more time. It was never on my side, yet I feel myself wondering why I was given something so perfect, if it had to be taken away so quickly? It's not gone for good, there are still traces, but as always I want more, I want it all. The moonlight guides me through the forest, helping me escape whatever might lurk in the dark abyss. I march forward, awaiting the moment when the sun shall rise again, and every breath I draw from my broken lips, tastes just a little bit of you.