Sky and sand...

How is it possible that I have everything I've ever wanted, yet feel as lost as ever - unable to calm my nerves, letting my old disease take hold, and knowingly making choices I'm bound to regret? I have changed, for sure, and for sure you were the catalyst. But this was not the kind of transformation I am accustomed to, one where my entire foundation is shaken, and every visible eye can see that I am no longer the boy they have learned to call their friend. This time it was far more subtle. Almost undetectable, yet equally altering. You influenced me by unravelling what true love really feels like. What it means to say forever, and truly stand by it. What it means to give your heart, even the tiniest pieces, and be certain they are safe. I never expected you'd take hold of me in ways you did, that we'd last this long, and even longer still, that every love story would become about you, that every song would call your name.