I'd do it all again...

Mystery of love...

Oh, to see without my eyes,

the first time that you kissed me,

boundless by the time I cried.

I built your walls around me,

white noise, what an awful sound -

fumbling by rogue river,

feel my feet above the ground.

Hand of God, deliver me.

You only get a minute...

I am slowly coming to terms that just because I don't get what I want at the exact time that I wanted it, that doesn't really erase the fact that I got it - I was just wrong about the timeline or the execution. I consider myself lucky, but would also like to believe that my blessings have been the product of my positive choices. We can never know for sure, though; is it fate or chance? I can never decide. Yet what is certain is that the future can be bright and it can be whatever we want, as long as we're willing to let go of all the preconceived notions of how our life is supposed to look like. It's going to be okay. Or better yet, it's going to be great. Just you wait.

I'm good with that...

Trying my best, not to get hurt...

Peace is not always easy to grasp or keep close. In the process of attaining and protecting it, you may find yourself tired, weary, and uncertain on how to keep your peace safe. While being uncertain is normal, continue to commit yourself to the harmony in your mind. You are worthy of every drop of sweetness and ease that you encounter. Being tested is a part of the journey. Giving up, and letting go, is not.

I laid there with my mind running amuck, on the brink of madness. And somehow, gradually, early Monday morning, I became calm. I can't think of any other word for it. I was thinking about the beach again, and I started to feel as if I was being looked after, that everything was okay. It was strange: if there was ever a time in my life when I had the right to feel anxious, this was it. But I lost that sense of apprehension. I felt like there was a force in the room with me, not a person, but I had a sense that there was another world, another dimension, and it would be looking after me. But somehow, standing in the clear night air, under a sky that glowed like a shower of sparks, none of that stuff mattered. It slipped off me. It was like shedding your clothes before you step in the shower. I felt I was down to essentials again. In fact I felt very close to Her at that moment. I guess if you're ever going to feel close to a dearly departed, it'll be while you're looking at the heavens.

You have yet to know...

To learn to see; to accustom the eye to calmness, to patience, and to allow things to come up to it; to defer judgment, and to acquire the habit of approaching and grasping an individual case from all sides. Such a realization was imperative for his rebirth, for music burst through him, perfect notes he heard rarely. Fire and ice, wind and calm, sky and earth, water and rock all fused together. One part of him seemed as wild and turbulent as the sea, yet beneath his fiery passion, at the very core of him, he was as forceful and strong and as constant as the deepest ocean currents. His other half was calm. Calm as windless lake, yet beneath the surface smoldered a volcano of such explosive magnitude, his power could easily sweep everything from his path. Together, both of these extremes completed each other, both melodies merging together into a single, perfect harmony.

Not all love songs are about love...

Where everything is fine...

The older I get the more that I see,

my parents aren't heroes, they're just like me.

And loving is hard, it don't always work,

you just try your best not to get hurt.

I used to be mad ,but now I know -

sometimes it's better to let someone go.

Look what you've taught me...

When I looked, I knew I might never again see so much of the earth so beautiful, the beautiful being something you know added to something you see, in a whole that is different from the sum of its parts. What I saw might have been just another winter scene, although an impressive one. But what I knew was that the earth underneath was alive and that by tomorrow, certainly by the day after, it would be all green again. For I once found a phoenix charred in its own ashes. I brought it home with me, wept through the night, and then tossed it to the wind--its brittle body dispersing all about. This thing without a name and deep within me - how it truly believes that if something is meant to take flight, then it must one way or another.

It just hadn't hit me yet...

I smell snow...

I love snow for the same reason I love Christmas: It brings people together while time stands still. Cozy couples lazily meandered the streets and children trudged sleds and chased snowballs. No one seemed to be in a rush to experience anything other than the glory of the day, with each other, whenever and however it happened. 

I have not yet lost the feeling of wonder, and of delight, that this delicate motion should reside in all the things around us, revealing itself only to those who look for it. I remember, in the winter of our first experiments, just seven years ago, looking on snow with new eyes. There the snow lay around my doorstep - great heaps of protons quietly recessing in the earth's magnetic field. To see the world for a moment as something rich and strange is the private reward of many a discovery. And maybe it's wrong when we remember breakthroughs to our own being as something that occurs in discrete, extraordinary moments. Maybe falling in love, the piercing knowledge that we ourselves will someday die, and the love of snow are in reality not some sudden events; maybe they were always present. Maybe they never completely vanish, either.

The older I get, the more that I see...

Sometimes it's better to let some things go...

How did it get so late so soon?

It is growing cold. Fall is slowly turning into winter and putting footsteps in the meadow. One could say milk-colored maidens are dancing on the petals of orchids. How coldly burns our sun. One would say its rays of light are shards of snow, one imagines the sun lives upon a snow crested peak on this day. One would say he is a man who wears a gown of winter frost that blinds the eyes. Helplessness has weakened me. Wandering has wearied my legs, for I am still learning to make things nice for myself. Slowly building myself a home with things I like. Colors that calm me down, a plan to follow when things get dark, a few people I try to treat right. I don't sometimes, but it's my intent to do so. I’m learning. I'm learning to save myself. I'm trying, as I always will.

Hear my love sing...

Every night you play me something sweet,

and when I'm down, you always change the key.

I need you now, my heart has lost the beat,

and I'm counting on your love, hey melody.

We both could use a reason just to smile,

so let me be your harmony tonight -

every note you hit cuts into me.

Learned from the pain...

It's a purple threaded evening. A torn god is laying on the roof. The sky is milky. The lavender hued moon shines against hot asphalt. The thickness of the evening presses into his throat. Polaroids taped to the ceiling. Ivy pouring out of the cracks in the wall. He found his courage buried beneath molding books and forgot to lock the door behind him. The old house never forgets. He opened his mouth and a dandelion fell out. Reached behind his tongue and found sopping wet seeds. Pulled all of his teeth out just to say he could. He drowned himself in a bottle of whiskey and the orange really brought out his demise. Lay him down on a bed of ground spices. There's a song there; he know's it. Amethyst geode eyes. Cracked open. No one saw it coming. November never loved him. The moon still doesn’t understand that.

I've loved and I've lost...

Surrender is the ultimate sign of strength and the foundation for a serene life. It affirms that we are no longer willing to live in pain. It expresses a deep desire to transcend our struggles and transform our negative emotions. It commands a life beyond our egos, beyond that part of ourselves that is continually reminding us that we are separate, different and alone. Surrendering allows us to return to our true nature and move effortlessly through the cosmic dance called life. It's a powerful statement that proclaims the perfect order of the universe.

When you give in, you are saying, "even though things are not exactly how I'd like them to be, I will face my reality. I will look it directly in the eye and allow it to be here." Surrender and serenity are synonymous; you can't experience one without the other. So if it's peace you're searching for, it's close by. All you have to do is resign as the puppeteer of the universe. Choose to trust that there is a greater plan for you and that if you let go, it will be unfolded in time. Surrender is a gift that you can give yourself. It's an act of faith. It's saying that even though I can't see where this river is flowing, I trust it will take me in the right direction.