The things you can't erase...

I find it quite unfortunate how when I finally get some time for myself and getting on in life, my brain starts playing tricks on me. I might be having a completely normal morning - a good night's sleep, chores out of the way, a smile on my lovers face, and then for no reason at all I get this wave of memory flushing over me so strong I have to sit down for fear I might keel over. It's usually some stupid little recollection. Something I haven't thought of for years. But it comes back so strong I feel undone. I finally got the peace and quiet I thought I was after all these years and now that it's here, I wish there was something to fill it back up again. These days I live more in my mind than on the ground. The past seems more real than what I spend my time doing.