Call it wishful thinking but I can't seem to shake this feeling that everything up until now was just a bad dream. That I'm about to wake up and realise that it was all a terrible nightmare. Of course my instincts have been wrong before...
I've decided to quit an old habbit. I don't really know why. I guess I sort of think it simbolises all the things that went wrong, all the things I could have done differently. Habbits are funny. They're these little things we clinge to in order to feel we have enough energy to overcome the obstacles in our lives. They comfort us. They make us feel secure. They can even go as far as making us feel a little better about ourselves, even if it is just temporary...
But the thing about habbits is that they're a gateway to addiction. I've had my fair share of those and nothing is worse than having to give up something that is so inherently part of your life. Be it a person or a activity. Giving it up hurts like hell. And when the pain reaches unimaginable porportions, all you can do is scream...
