Admitting is the first step...

I want to stand by your side, because I know this must not be easy. I try to hold your hand as you navigate through the rubble that has become your life. I try to support you, encourage you, be patient with you, but there are moments, the darkest times, when my minds strays to thoughts of leaving you behind. I wonder if that would make me weak or simply selfish? If I'd regret my decision, and if I'd miss you. The bond we created never seemed so fragile, and while I pray and hope for a different outcome, I sense that as always, this story will consist of an ending I can see from miles away, yet still, it will knock me off my feet.

As he fakes the faintest of smiles, and tries to suppress every fibber of his being from imploding from the sheer pressure of holding on to someone who does not want to be held, he realises that some battles can only be fought by losing, and conceding retaliation. He shall turn the other cheek, and wait for you to realise by yourself that you have been unfair. That the boy laying beside you, is in fact, not nearly a boy, but a man. A man who deserves every ounce of your respect, of your time, of your resolve to be loved. You will not banish him by being distant, you shall do so by being ignorant of the fact that he is already gone. And when he is no longer in your arms, his absence won't be felt like a tidal wave sweeping across the shore, destroying everything in its wake. Rather, you shall miss him like a breeze on a sunny day - as if you never needed him, yet somehow, can't live without.