Stand up on my shoulders...

Tell me what you see?

Today is your big moment. The life you've been waiting for is happening all around you. The scene unfolding right outside your window is worth more than the most beautiful painting. This is it. This is life in all its glory, swirling and unfolding around us, disguised as pedantic, pedestrian non-events. But pull off the mask and you will find your life, waiting to be made, chosen, woven, crafted. Your life, right now, today, is exploding with energy and power and detail and dimension, better than the best movie you have ever seen. You and your family and your friends and your home and your dinner table have all the makings of a life of epic proportions, a story for the ages. Because they all are. Every life is. You have stories worth telling, memories worth remembering, dreams worth working toward, a body worth feeding, a soul worth tending, and beyond that, the universe dwells within you, the true culmination of super and natural. You are more than dust and bones. You are spirit and power and image of god. And you have been given today.

Breaking boulders beneath my feet...

It seems forever stopped today...

I think I may have taken for granted certain things and it seems that I will soon get another lesson in defeat and disappointment. This time it feels peculiar though, mostly because I can't really pinpoint what exactly went wrong, and what I would have done differently if given the chance. Is that why my response is mostly rational? Yes, I feel the frustration of discontent, yet nowhere near what I used to when faced with similar circumstances. Maybe this is what it means to grow up - to realise that failure and adversity can't always be avoided. That even with the best intentions and the greatest of aspirations we are bound to stumble.

There are times when I’m confidently skipping along, thinking that I am impenetrable and infinite ... and then I trip over my own poorly-placed steps and fall face first into the thickets. But I think there's a sort of beauty in falling. Each time I collapse, I'm reminded that I'm still human, that I'm still learning, that there will always be more lessons, growth, and discovery up ahead. So, although I have times when I'm weak, when I'm critical of myself, or I lose hope, I wouldn't give them up for the world. I cherish them – because it's the risk of falling that makes life a grand adventure rather than just a guided tour.

Saying love will kill the fear...

I have to admit, I'm finding it hard to catch my new rhythm. I didn't think the beginning of this year would present so many challenges so soon. I wanted to center myself before the inevitable onslaught had begun, yet it seems I shall not be given the luxury. But even though I have clearly lost the first few battles, the war is far from over. Sometimes retreat is the best option - to gather your strength and change tactics. Just because something worked in the past, it doesn't mean it ought to serve you in the future. The circumstances have changed ever so slightly, therefore I must adapt as well. My heart must accustom itself to changing times. My body as well. If not I might be headed down an all to familiar path, with days in a muffler of regret. So I say; not today. Not yet.

In memory of memories...

Wild horses couldn't drag me away...

Childhood living, it's easy to do.

The things that you wanted,
well I bought them for you.

Graceless lady, you know who I am,

you know I can't let you
 just slide through my hands.

The moon has never seen me before...

I really want to get a head start on this year. I underestimated so many things in the past that I always felt like I was barely catching up instead of leading the race. I guess it worked out fine in the end, I just wish it didn't take such a mental toll on me. So here I am, gathering the last fragments of my personal life and creating order where there was once chaos. And even though some things are forever lost to the juggernaut that is time, I shall keep going - creating new memories and attaching myself to greater stories. Because this year I do not wish for a new becoming, but rather a more pristine sense of the one already materialised, and of course, above all, the grace and dignity to let go of the things not meant for me.

Let me tell you how it happened...

Didn't expect to hear from me so soon, did you? Well changes are knocking or better yet, are being demanded, and with them come new responsibilities - ones that need to be addressed hardheartedly and with speed. Beware, for the dawn of a new year heralds with it a becoming in the works for almost three decades. Fear not, though, a gentle breeze shall usher its birth, followed by a shroud of mist, beckoning the great winds to come.

Such a commotion had risen in him, he hardly knew how to react. It was like a previously undistinguished painting in the perfect frame, revealing its beauty in full luminous detail. In the sunlight he was a mythical creature, a nymph, with delicate features and opalescent eyes. The most confounding realisation was that it wasn't really anything special that had concealed all this from the world. Just that no one had ever noticed how stunning he was because he had deliberately kept them from seeing it. Why? He asked, his voice husky. Why would you conceal something so beautiful? What are you hiding from?