Good as hell...

In one way, I suppose, I have been in denial for some time, knowingly burning the candle at both ends and finding that it often gives a lovely light. But for precisely that reason, I can't see myself smiting my brow with shock or hear myself whining about how it's all so unfair: I have been taunting the universe into sending Armageddon in my direction and have now succumbed to something so predictable and banal that it bores even me. I think this year has to simply end. I know it's still far gone, but I literally feel both fulfilled and spent, filled with joy and sadness, accomplishment and regret, and I somehow need to figure out how that can be.