I'll be your answer, I'll be your wish...

I've never had a moment when I thought: "Karr, you've made it!", and I don't think I want to, because that feels like you've reached the end; that you've crossed the finish line. But to me there is no end. An achievement is not a finish line; it's a checkpoint on a far greater journey. It's a moment to pause, to take a breath and look back and enjoy what you've experienced and be grateful for it, but then to turn around and look towards the next checkpoint, the next achievement.

We can be walking around in this world, with bits and pieces of our souls scattered in different time loops and space cracks. You feel like you are always looking for yourself, because you actually are! You're always looking for those bits and pieces of you. You've got to sit down and remember where you left them at. You've got to quiet the noise and go back to those loops in time and cracks in space that you forgot about and you need to understand and embrace yourself in those moments. And maybe even embrace those who were around you, with you. That's how you get those pieces back, that's how you sew them back into you.

Between me and paradise...

I was afraid to go...

There’s no point in waiting for Godot. He never arrives. That's the whole point. In Dante’s Limbo, the Ignavi are always waiting. Their crime in life was that they preferred to wait until everything was decided rather than commit themselves to a cause when its prospects were uncertain, and now they are condemned to wait forever in the vestibule of hell. Anyone can jump on a bandwagon. The heroes are those who got involved long before the bandwagon even arrived. You have to find a cause and commit yourself fully. That's the first step in giving meaning to your life.

Learn to be brave, see the other side...

You need to accept your greatness, you need to rise up into your full stature, because if you don't, you are going to continually bow down low to enter into the caves of those who would have you believing that you were born for the underdark; when in fact, those are their hollows and they were made especially for them. You think that you're not allowed to stand tall in your mind, heart and body - but you are! And when you do, you'll see how little those caverns and the people in them, really are. It's difficult, because you want everyone to matter, but really, most of them just don't. Only a few do. Most of them aren't even worth being mad at.

Help me find what I'm missing...

 

Every secret, I'll listen...

In the fading light, hearts collide,

shadows dance in the distance.

Something just ain't right, I'm cold inside,

help me find what I'm missing.

We're all scared to fly, still we try,

learn to be brave, see the other side.

Won't you lead me there? Have no fear,

close your eyes, find paradise.

Scared to fly, still I try...

Words can be twisted into any shape. Promises can be made to lull the heart and seduce the soul. In the final analysis, words mean nothing. They are labels we give things in an effort to wrap our puny little brains around their underlying natures, when ninety-nine percent of the time the totality of reality is an entirely different beast. The wisest man is the silent one. Examine my actions. Judge me by them.

There are metaphors more real than the people who walk in the street. There are images tucked away in books that live more vividly than many men and women. There are phrases from literary works that have a positively human personality. There are passages from his own writing that chill him with fright, so distinctly does he feel them as people, so sharply outlined do they appear against the walls of his room, at night, in shadows. He has written sentences whose sound, read out loud or silently, can only be of something that acquired absolute exteriority and a full-fledged soul.

A lot of things different...

As a new cycle is about to start, and I shed the remaining remnants of the one before, I barely even feel anything as I do. I guess I've grown accustomed to it and the realisation that what has been lost can always be found once more, brings me comfort. My story has countless chapters, and not everyone will make it through them all. Yet I have love in my heart for all the characters that chose to play a part in my design. Disdain only serves my weaker instincts, because as it so happens, once every so often, I manage to pick the right thing, the exact best thing. Every day, the moment I open my eyes and pull off my blankets, that's what I hope for. The sunshine on my face, warm enough to make my heart sing.