Keep on going until you hit the spot...

I have decided not to aim for success anymore, because I found that the more I make it a target, the more times I miss. I think that success, like happiness, cannot be pursued; it must ensue, and it only does so as the unintended side effect of one's personal dedication to a cause greater than oneself or as the by-product of one's surrender to a person other than oneself. Happiness must happen, and the same holds for success: I just have to let it happen by not caring about it. I want to listen to what my conscience commands and go on to carry it out to the best of my knowledge. Then, hopefully, I will live to see that in the long run - in the long run, for sure! - success will follow me precisely because I had forgotten to think about it.

And I have realised that I don't mind being a pawn in someone else's game - it is the most magical piece of all, I think. Actually. It might look small and ordinary but all you need to do is find a way to keep moving forward. One square after another. And you can get to the other side and unlock all kinds of power. Maybe that's what all lives were, though. Maybe even the most seemingly perfectly intense or worthwhile lives ultimately felt the same. Acres of disappointment and monotony and hurts and rivalries but with flashes of wonder and beauty at the end of chessboard. Maybe that was the only meaning that mattered. To be the world, witnessing itself, one move after the other.