All my favorite songs...

I've tried Jack,

I've tried Jim,

I've tried every last one of them.

Old heartbreak bottles up on that shelf,

But the burn doesn't work,

and the buzz doesn't help.

Been taking these shots, 

everything they've got,

but the whiskey doesn't kill like it's supposed to,

your memory must be bulletproof.

Outlines of new eyes and visions of you...

The reality of my life has become an unsettling arabesque puzzle and I still want to add more filigree embroidery to it, so I might, some day, expect to stray from the point of recognition, lose the final thread, be expelled to the edge of delusion and forced to dance on the brim of chaos. If anything, my capacity for self-delusion is apparently infinite so how am I ever meant to know, except by existing in a state of absolute pessimism, that once again I am fooling myself? No, no. This is it. I can really feel it this time. It's all going to work out exactly as I imagine. 

He is heaven sent...

He is your shelter from the storm. He is your strength when you are weak. He is the fire that burns through your veins and heats you when you are in need. He is the one who will fill your heart and protect the life you will create together. He is your light in the darkness and the one who guides your way when you are lost. He is the creature who will destroy worlds to keep you and will never allow you to fall. He is wind in the night. The sail of a sturdy boat about to embark on a long voyage. He is not a shield; he is a sword. He is not a victim; he is a victor. And who are you?

The future of my past...

I don't know this song...

Here's what I know, or at least think I know: life is infinite energy coupled with limitless creative imagination. It is the invisible essence and substance of every visible form. Its nature is goodness, truth, wisdom, beauty, energy, and imagination. And I found that my highest satisfaction comes from a sense of conscious union with this invisible force. The eye of the universe. All my endeavours are an attempt to find it and get back to it. To find such an inward wholeness that all sense of fear, doubt, and uncertainty vanish and I'm able to become a conscious observer. 

It's easy to pretend...

I saw tears outline your face...

How lucky are we?

It's been a hell of a year, 

but I'm all grown now.

There's smoke seeping

out of your bloody teeth,

but you're home somehow.

Echoes of the eye...

This song is new to me, but I am honored to be a part of it. Come now. We have awaited this moment for a long time. For so long. It is no trouble to wait a little longer. No. I believe we've reached the end of this journey. All that remains is to collapse the innumerable possibilities before us. Are you ready to learn what comes next? I know it's tempting to linger in this moment, while every possibility still exists, but unless they are crumbled by a conscious observer, they will never be more than possibilities. 

I watched the night sky with it's countless stars and its moon, and I wondered about the universe and all that had been created, why the stars and the moon rose at night and the sun in the day, how vast it must be, how I could never understand the infinite measure of its size. How it is not possible to express the most precious insights, to see all that craves to be seen, to visit even the closest neighbors in our galaxy, to learn all that needs to be learned, to live without dying, and I am sad about it. But I have lived and am still alive at least. And I am happy about that.

A new excuse, another stupid reason...

 

Stop the world to stop the feeling...

The future depends on the past,

even if we don’t get to see it.

Nevertheless, the game gave me a feeling I had never had before. That the past was like a story, in which one thing led to another, and the world was not a boundless mystery, but a finite thing that could be comprehended. It made me make connections of things I previously thought were a jumble of circumstance and accident. Just like the protagonist, I heard a call, and am retracing the clues it left behind to find it. The beginning of myself. The eye of the universe that created me. And a hope of observing it, as it collapse into itself and starts to reform.

Good luck, babe...

What do you mean? How can you be so easily turned from your design? I thought you said this was a glorious journey? And specifically, because the way wasn't smooth, but full of dangers and terror. And now, behold, with the first imagination of failure, or, if you will, the first mighty and terrific trial of your courage, you shrink away, and are content to be handed down as a man who had not enough strength to endure cold and peril. Now is the time to steady to your purposes, and firm as a rock. So that you don't have to return to your loved ones disgraced and marked by defeat. Return as someone who has fought and conquered, and who knows not what it is to turn their back on their fate.

Just need a little bit of air...

Talking about how the world ends...

Let's lay in the dead grass,

stare at the stars,

run away,

and live out of cars.

Let's just leave here,

because there's nothing left to see,

and if that's wrong, 

let's make it right.

Drown me out, but I learnt...

He held onto his control with everything he had left after such a nightmarish period, but he could feel his grip slipping. Endure, he warned himself, and on its tail-end came a desperate; how much longer?

For the last two years, I spit and cursed and fought. For two years, I dragged myself off the ground no matter what humiliations and anxieties the universe heaped on me. And then, this morning in fact, I simply didn't have the strength anymore. It made no sense to fight. Instead, I needed to revert my energy into understanding my place in this world. That'd be easier for me. The pain and regret wouldn't stop; no, that would be far too easy. But maybe accepting that I won't get it, despite deserving it, would make it easier to bear. I think I could live with that, not that I have any other choice.

He's gone, dance on...

Time breaks your heart...

I still believe in symmetry, so this will be the last part of this journey. I've realised that I've reached an end if I return to where I started. I also remain superstitious about certain numbers. I still make wishes when the time shows repeating numbers. I still see signs, where others see mundane daily events. But the universe in its immensity is nevertheless of a piece, and what applies at one end of it applies at the other. No doubt I must break the chains of this circle and start walking a path towards another. I think I see something above the horizon.