Saturday, April 15, 2017

Give me to the world...

Actual happiness always looks pretty squalid in comparison with the overcompensations for misery. And, of course, stability isn't nearly so spectacular as instability. Being content has none of the glamour of a good fight against misfortune, none of the picturesqueness of a struggle with temptation, or a fatal overthrow by passion or doubt. Happiness is never grand. Maybe the truth is, there's a little bit of loser in all of us. Being happy isn't having everything in your life be perfect. Maybe it's about stringing together all the little things.


It shouldn't be easy to be amazing. Then everything would be. It's the things you fight for and struggle with before earning that have the greatest worth. When something's difficult to come by, you'll do that much more to make sure it's even harder - or impossible - to lose. So as I stand on the brink of something great, of something I cannot quite put my finger on, I look back at the road that brought me here. I think of the times I thought I was through, of the times when it seemed that nothing I do holds any meaning, any sway with the gods above. I picture the agony I once held so dear, for which I believed there was no cure, yet it was as simple as writing these words. One does not grow, because of want. One grows because of need. Something so inherently wrong, that you have no choice but to find newer meanings and newer fields to reap. Something brighter than the stars, something that can lead you home.