A sun killer lullaby...

Hold me like the pebbles in your hand...

No one is strong enough to withstand seeing too much of the universe's plan in advance. It must be revealed daily. And we must be led to it and through it slowly. There isn't any timing that seems like the right timing to be shattered into dust. There isn't any plan life could present where I would willingly agree to be broken into unglueable pieces. I just wouldn't, and what a tragedy that would be. My controlling things would prevent the dust required to make the new me I so desperately desire. Adversity breeds advancement. And I am ready to ascend. 

All amber lights and warning bells...

I'm just staring at the ceiling,

can't describe this feeling.

I've got in my head,

I'm out of body in my bed.

And I'm just searching up my symptoms,

desperate to fix them.

I'll do anything,

because lately I've been spiraling,

I'm not feeling like myself and

nothing ever seems to help.

Call me mister know it all...

His life was at a teetering point, and he was about to fall off the edge of a cliff. He was spiraling down a black pit, and there was nothing that was going to stop him. Once you're falling through the air, it's impossible to turn yourself around. The gravity of my actions was pulling him down, down, down. He saw black until sanity began to creep from the confines of his mind, leaving little more than a skeleton-like remnant of who he once was. Not inanimate but inactive, still alive but very much aloof, he started to passively float through the steps of life, numb.

As seemed to be the theme of my days recently, I was questioning my reality, questioning my dreams, questioning my mind, questioning what was real, what was imagined, and then questioning why. I was feeling displaced, like an outsider, as though I were simply doing a pale impersonation of myself. And not even a good impersonation either, with steps too long, breaths too quick, smile too wide, blinks too slow. Get a hold of yourself, idiot. So I searched the room, searched my world, interrogating the shadows, prodding the corners, acknowledging the spaces, seeking for something to ground myself. Anything at all.

Well I hope you do...

You will hear thunder and remember him, And think: he wanted storms. The rim of the sky will be the colour of hard crimson. And his heart will be on fire. Despite what it may seem, Time does indeed exist here, in small amounts. Feint forces of the universe they were, nearly indiscernible from the nothingness. A wind of change is blowing at him from behind and he needs to push forward with iron determination and a mental clarity hereto before unknown to him. Something in the microcosm that didn't even have a name went bling and against all the laws of probability, he is starting to open his eyes.

You're the only place I need...

I've seen it all too many times...

Riding on the wind...

When days are long, 

I drift away,

I play that song,

I used to play.

When skies are always summertime blue,

just like that, 

I'm back to loving life again.

Put me in the slammer...

These feelings aren't going away. They are linger. Hovering. They are with me always. These emotions are my roommates now, bunking up beside me at night. They are determined to ruin me, and yet I can never fully evict them from my brain. Most days now, they lie dormant in me. Sometimes it gets so quiet in my brain I think they've finally packed up and left. But then, suddenly, I start raging over the smallest of things. At first I'm perplexed, and then I remember: it's here again. I am still quite a bit mad.