Sometimes I think I have felt everything I'm ever going to feel,
and from here on out, I'm not going to experience anything new
- just lesser versions of what I've already felt.
I'm sitting here, thinking of all the things I want to apologise for, and be forgiven for. I'm thinking of all the pain I've caused, of all the promises I didn't keep, and everything I've put on to you, anything I needed you to be, needed you to say - I'm sorry for that. Even though I'm certain you don't feel the same, I need you to realise that I will always love you, because you made me who I am. I just wanted you to know that there will be a piece of you in me, always, and I'm grateful for that. Whatever someone you become, wherever you are in the world, and whoever is holding your hand and standing beside you, I'm sending you love. You're my friend until the end, even if only in my head, and even if I never cross your mind again.
Being with you was like reading a book ... the first one I was determined to finish. I was reading it slowly, like the words were really far apart and the spaces in between were almost infinite. I can still feel you, the words of our story, yet it's in this endless distance that I'm finding myself now. It's not a place that's of the physical world. It's where everything else is that I didn't even know existed. I loved you so much - you have no idea. But this is where I am now. This is who I've become, and I need to let you go. As much as I would want to, I can't write this story any longer. I can't keep holding on to memories that made me happier than I've ever been, more at peace than I dare to admit. There is nothing left to do, nothing left to say, but try to phantom the idea that I'll probably never find someone ... that I'll probably never find someone like you.
