I wanted different things. Things I can't even write about or explain. I'm not sure how I conjured them in my head - all I know is that the day after she died, thoughts and fantasies came rushing through my mind, as if a part of her was left behind, planting these wishes inside of my heart, guiding me towards a destiny I can't begin to phantom. It is so intangible that I sometimes find it hard to fall asleep, because I try and try to picture what the future looks like, who's standing beside me, where I am, what I'm doing, but all I see are images that are not of this world. With each passing day my circumstances make less sense, and I am left reminiscing about a past I didn't live, and a present that was never meant to exist. I ponder what I should do next - yet as it turns out, the decisions are not really mine to make. I am in the hands of her daunting will, and I can't even pretend I could predict what might happen next. Will I get sick? Will I fly? Will I be able to let go, and love like I loved her? I have no idea, truly ... I have no idea at all.
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He stared at the moon for so long that the sun eclipsed his sight. He could't move or go home, because he realised it was over. He wasn't bitter or sad or angry, for he was so sure that what he felt was real. And if perhaps in some distant alternate universe you see each other in your new lives, completely different, but somehow the same, he shall smile at you with gratitude and remember how you walked your first steps together - learning from each other and growing in spite, or maybe, because of everything that you had to endure. Never forget that the best kind of people are the ones who touch the slumbering parts of you, the ones you didn't even know where there. These people plant a fire in your core that grows wild through your body and brings warmth to your mind - that is what you have given him. That's what he hopes to give someone forever.
