The game has changed. It is slowly starting to make sense. I still can't quite see the finish line, but I know it's close. I might be in the lead, though I'm not really sure. Up until I reach the end I'm always uncertain as to how I am doing compared to everyone else. I guess it's better this way, because without the ability to judge my progress on the basis of others, I make sure that I never let my guard down and expose myself to my longtime nemesis...
While the game itself transformed, the rules remain the same, as in, there are none. We play dirty, we cheat a little, sometimes we even stop to catch our breath, but all of us play to win. We all want to be the best at something, anything. The important thing to remember, is that we should never try to impose that something upon others. I tried it with someone recently, suffice it to say it failed miserably...
After a day like today, when so many dreams came true, and so many didn't, I can't help but wish that She would be here, so that I could have someone who would understand. She always did or at least she pretended to, either way it truly sucks that I can't share all of this with her. The funny thing is that I have no one else to blame but me. One moment of recklessness and everything changed, everyone changed, except for her, who was because of that single moment, lost forever...
