A lot of people just want to be rescued from themselves. They wish they could be airlifted from their skin and dropped of into someone elses. Me, I just wish I could stay the same for at least a week. But then ironically I'd be a whole different person...
Change can be good for the soul. It can free you from your past, it can cause uncertainty for the future. Usually the only thing it does, is that it makes the present a little more tolerable, even if for just a few moments. Sometimes change is long overdue. It comes when we've already given up on everything, never before. It loves to torture us by prolonging its arival for as long as possible. But then when it finally comes, most forget about the agony which they had to endure while waiting and embrace the change with all they have...
In my case, change is just a big pain in the ass. It causes way too much trouble and confusion. I fear change yet at the same time I can't stop wishing that basically everything would change. I had hoped that I would enter this year with a sense of calm and direction. But as it seems I am more torn than ever. Luckily I found a new ally and I told him everything, including all the secrets of my past. He took it better than I thought. Actually I almost think he understood and maybe, just maybe, he might have all the answers I've been looking for...
